How to gain a positive perspective when you feel overwhelmed

If you’re struggling to gain a positive perspective when you feel overwhelmed or find it tricky to keep your head during stressful situations, you’re not alone. But doing so is an essential skill in today’s workplace, so what can you do about it? Laura Drury is here with her ideas to help you manage your stress levels and feel more in control. 

The blurring of work/life boundaries

‘If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you…’

This line from Rudyard Kipling’s poem, ‘If’ (oft-quoted by my father as I was growing up) has frequently popped into my mind of late. In fact, it’s been since the third lockdown, when I did wonder if mine had taken leave on several occasions.

More recently, whilst not counting myself out of the equation, I’ve noticed many of the people I know, or work with, seem to be checking in on theirs too.  Is it me, or does everyone seem exhausted?

Whilst we’re ever closer to the ‘new normal’, we’re not there yet. Work/life boundaries are still very much blurred. And therein lies the rub. 

Technology that’s been so enabling throughout recent events is, unfortunately, part of the problem. Reflect on the following questions for a moment:

• How long have you spent in front of your screen today?
• How many breaks did you have?
• How many video meetings did you take?
• How often did you stand up and move?

Don’t worry, you’re not alone!

Screentime habits

It isn’t just workload that impacts your energy levels - excessive time spent in front of your screen does too.

Neuroscientist Andrew Huberman, from Stanford University, describes how “The eyes are not just two external things connected to the brain. In a very real sense, they are the brain.” Our eyes play the most significant role in how we think and feel, and in what we do, as they set the level of how sleepy or alert we are.

He also explains how, ‘when the eyes are open, a large amount of the electrical activity of the brain will be involved in seeing.’ So if you’re putting undue strain on your eyes, you’re using up your energy levels more quickly! You’re also changing the quality of your eyesight (becoming more short-sighted) and making yourself more irritable (if you’re like me) or grumpy (if you’re like my hubby).

But if your work depends on your screen, what can you do?

Managing your screen time

• Give your eyes distance- regularly move your eyes away from your screen and, where possible, look into the distance – shifting perspective will help. If you’re near a window, try and work near it so you can look outside

• Regularly step away from your screen – not only is this good for your eyesight and cognitive energy but it also helps your body and allows your brain to absorb what you’ve worked on so far

• Close your eyes and, even for just 10 seconds, focus on your breath

• Reduce your video calls – they were fantastic in lockdown and are still useful for hybrid working today, butif you’re repeatedly going from one call to another, on a screen, you’re impairing your productivity. Go old school, have a phone call and take your meeting outside. You’re more likely to have satisfactory and productive conversations, whilst boosting your body and brain health.

How else can you manage stress?

Of course, it isn’t just screen time alone. There are many factors at play when you feel overwhelmed. However, none is so powerful as mindset. 

Dr Alia Crum, Tenure Professor of Psychology at Stanford University, focuses a lot of her work on mindset, including how we think about stress. She explains that, in order to manage stress more positively, you need to think about it differently. The very belief that stress is bad for you makes it so. 

The first step is to create awareness and acknowledge that you’re stressed. Next, recognise you feel that way because ‘stress is connected to care’. Crum suggests by asking yourself what the goal is, what’s motivating you to do this, you ‘shift your stress to a more positive frame’.

Of course, how we fuel our body plays a part too. Since time immemorial, we’ve been encouraged to eat more healthily but with the focus being on our physical health. Now, there’s substantial evidence, increasing by the minute, that what we eat impacts our mental health too.

So if you’re going through a period of stress, really focus on the foods that will help rather than hinder. Yes, leafy greens, seeds and lentils but also dark chocolate (now you have an excuse) and some complex carbs (bring out the wheat bread) Yum!

Finally, seek help from friends, colleagues or loved ones. In her TED Talk, Kelly McGonigal describes how negative beliefs around stress are bad for you but also how seeking and giving support to one another alleviates that stress as well, whilst offering significant heart health benefits!

But be mindful of consuming or listening to too much ‘toxic positivity’ - being told you ‘just need to focus on the positives’ or ‘look on the bright side’ isn’t helpful. It’s actually perfectly normal to feel negative emotions, and so finding someone you can talk to about it honestly and openly is really important. Banish those motivational fridge magnets and focus on how you’re really feeling.

In summary

There are many suggestions already, but my top 3 steps for putting this into practice are:

1. Pause – acknowledge that you feel stressed or overloaded. Then move away from your screen or into a different room. This alone interrupts habitual thinking patterns and helps you shift your focus from your feelings to the facts.
2. Challenge – what are thinking? Where does that belief come from? As Crum said, ask why this is so important/why do you care? 
3. Choose – what’s the next best thing you can do? Close your eyes and breath? Go for a walk? Find a friend? That first action will then help you feel more in control and better able to manage.

Your wellbeing really does matter to us at Laughology, so we’re investing in it. We’ve created ‘The Happiness Fund’ to support projects aimed at improving wellbeing and mental health. If you’d like to apply, click the link to find out more.

Right, I’m going to walk the talk by stepping away from my screen and maybe eating some dark chocolate...