Being stressed at work is not a mental illness; it’s part of life

Are we creating unhelpful links to phrases like ‘workplace stress’ and ‘anxiety’ and, in doing so, amplifying normal levels of human experiences to the point where people start to associate them with mental illness? How do we know when worry and anxiety are serious enough to stop us from working? Research suggests it’s younger people in particular who are most likely to walk away from workplaces because of their mental health; what’s causing this? What are the implications for individuals’ society and the economy, and what do we do about it? These are the questions that I’m ‘nervously’ going to try to answer in this blog.

Opening up conversations is important for normalising mental illness, especially with young people who are vulnerable and marginalised, but are we using the language of mental health too flippantly? Almost every month somewhere in the world, there is an awareness day for one aspect of mental health or another, be it happiness, workplace wellbeing, stress, or anxiety. HR communications often build these campaigns with the best intentions. Being stressed at work is not a mental illness; it’s part of life. According to research by psychologist Lucy Foulkes from the University of Oxford, the constant focus can medicalise these experiences. In her latest book, ‘What Mental Illness Really Is… (and what it isn’t)’, she asks the question we’re all quietly pondering: 

“In the quest for mental health awareness, are we inadvertently creating more challenges than solutions?”  

The focus on Mental Health is positive, but let’s not oversimplify it.

On the one hand, the increased focus on mental health, especially in the workplace, is a positive development; acknowledging the genuine psychological challenges people face and the impact these can have on both individuals and organisational performance is much needed. On the other hand, this focus could pathologise normal variations in mood and behaviour, leading to overdiagnosis, overtreatment and time-out, which can potentially make symptoms worse. Often, campaigns are generally designed for social media and can oversimplify complex subjects such as anxiety disorder, OCD and other complexities.

What are ways of dealing with a mental health challenge at work?

At Laughology, we constantly hear from workplaces that report increasing numbers of people off with ill mental health or individuals who opt out of supporting additional projects, citing anxiety or workplace stress as a reason. This is hard for managers and leaders because they are not psychiatrists, and concern for individuals’ wellbeing must be paramount. 

Often, they can only concur, giving a pass from the team away day without considering a strategy for reintroducing someone safely back into future projects or activities. Therefore, it perpetuates the situation. This then becomes a vicious circle because if you never do the thing you’re anxious about, you never conquer your anxiety. The best way to learn the coping skills that build resilience is to do things and take risks. Now, I’m not saying for everyone, and every situation is unique, but maybe opting out is creating the mental health crisis we’re seeing. 

Work was the only normal part of my life when life felt overwhelming.

I speak from a very real experience when, at the start of 2023, after losing my Dad to cancer and suffering a complex miscarriage at the same time, my anxiety levels were through the roof. The only small bit of normality I had in my life was work. I had some very dark days, probably unbeknown to my team.

When you feel like curling up in a ball and ignoring the world, turning up to events as the Head of Happiness and knowing an audience expects laughter is tough. This went on for months, and each day, I would try new things; some helped me move forward and feel better, and some didn’t. The important thing to remember is everyone’s different, and carrying on is not for everyone, nor should it be put on people; it was my choice. 

However, we need to recognise when work can benefit us. I appreciate this is complex and, for managers and leaders, very difficult territory to be in. Personally, without work, I would have had little to get up for. Coming through that experience has helped me develop additional coping skills and build better relationships with my team, who pulled together to support me when I needed it. 

So, how do we know what to do to help individuals best? It’s about getting to know the person, or maybe their family, if they struggle, including them in conversations if agreed upon. Personalising a solution by understanding the individual in front of you. 

How do we encourage resilience in the workplace?

There's a growing emphasis on developing resilience skills through training, mentorship, and supportive relationships. Creating an environment that fosters mental well-being provides support for mental health issues, essential for helping everyone cope even through tough times. Here at Laughology, we hear this is especially important for young people. It's not necessarily a matter of Gen Z having less resilience; rather, a mix of societal, cultural, and economic factors.

Terms like 'illness' and 'disorder' may not always be beneficial

The current push for mental health dialogue is positive, yet there's a growing need to refine our approach. Misunderstandings of mental health terminology, such as the misuse of clinical labels like social anxiety, PTSD, and depression, have created confusion. The truth is mental health exists on a spectrum, with no clear dividing line between having a disorder and not having one. 

Would I have said I had depression or a mental illness at the start of this year? I’m honestly not sure. Was it a very normal part of grieving? Definitely. Would I have benefited from time off or pausing life? For me, no. But that’s not to say others wouldn’t. Terms like 'illness' and 'disorder' may not always be beneficial, but public discourse often lacks this nuance. Many individuals may mistakenly self-diagnose or adopt these labels into their identity, sometimes in counterproductive ways, while those in severe distress can remain marginalised.

Moving forward, deepening the conversation is crucial, fostering a more informed and nuanced understanding of mental health that goes beyond labels and statistics. This can help ensure that while we continue to destigmatise mental health issues, we also provide effective support and clarity for those who genuinely need it, creating resilient teams and individuals.

Promoting mental wellbeing at work:

1. The goal isn’t to eliminate anxiety but to help a person manage it.

None of us wants to see an individual unhappy, but the best way to help people overcome anxiety isn’t to try to remove the stressors that trigger it. Normalising feelings of sadness and anxiety is helpful, as well as sharing ways to tolerate it and function as well as possible through it. For me, this was regular breathing exercises, recognising my triggers early on and being able to talk myself down rather than up into a worse state. It didn’t always work, but I got better at it. And as a byproduct of that, the anxiety decreased over time. 

Encouraging people to take on smaller bits of work, having regular catch-ups with them on what extra help they need, and supporting them to find positive solutions can help ease anxieties. Some people need this more than others; it’s about personalising different needs and knowing your team well.  At Laughology, we call this ‘Big Chats, Little Chats’ – regular conversations that help everyone.

2. Express positive but realistic expectations.

Life is full of small challenges which create anxiety and stress. This is a normal part of life. There can sometimes be a mismatch between people's expectations of the working world and the reality they encounter. This dissonance can lead to disappointment and stress.  Regular conversations that continually clarify expectations help everyone. 

3. Respect their feelings, but don’t indulge them.

It’s important to understand that compassion doesn’t always mean agreement. So, if a person has anxiety over a new piece of work or a team event, you don’t want to belittle those fears, but you also don’t want to amplify them. Listen and be empathetic, help them understand what they’re anxious about, and encourage them to feel that they can face their fears. You want to send the message: “I know you’re scared, and that’s okay and normal, and I’m here, and I’m going to help you get through this.”

4. Don’t ask leading questions.

Encourage individuals to talk about their feelings, but try not to ask leading questions such as, “Are you anxious about the presentation?” or “Is the amount of work stressing you out?” To avoid feeding the cycle of anxiety, just ask open-ended questions such as: “How are you feeling about work?”

5. Support groups are great – make them helpful and with a positive focus

While support groups are helpful, they can become places that create echo chambers, perpetuating a problem. Having positive guidance for how things are discussed and shared can help. Ensuring there is a positive influence in the group and someone who knows a little about helping people think in more helpful ways can make a huge difference.

 6. Try to role model healthy ways of handling stress and anxiety and talk about what you do to keep on being well and looking after yourself

Letting others see your vulnerability as a manager or leader and that you have days where things feel like a lot helps everyone understand this is okay.  Talk about what you do, how you cope and what regular activities help you keep calm and in control on the more challenging days.

Encouraging the whole team to share their own worries and how they overcame them normalises these feelings. It helps build the narrative that we develop our abilities to cope by going through struggles. After all, resilience isn’t about what we do in the moment; it’s about what we continually do to fill up our resilience bank so there’s plenty to take out when needed.

For great information and insight, listen to BBC Radio 4 - Analysis, Can the UK afford a mental health crisis?

To get further support from us here at Laughology, contact Doug - doug@laughology.co.uk - who will explain how we can help.