How much is your organisation doing to support men’s mental health in the workplace? Does the culture promote open, honest conversations or is it still a taboo subject? In this blog post, Dave Keeling gives his tips to get the conversation started and help you develop a supportive environment both at home and at work.
Men’s mental health - the stats
It’s nearly a year since I lost a very good friend of mine to pancreatic cancer and so, despite it being World Kindness Day, November 13th stirs up a mixture of emotions for me. All of which I’m happy to discuss, as I’m lucky and fortunate enough to be surrounded by family, friends and colleagues who are always very encouraging when it comes to expressing my feelings. To give you an insight into my emotional self, I cried at the end of High School Musical 3 and am yet to get to the end of Monsters Inc without shedding a tear...
I’m also acutely aware, however, that this is not the case for a lot of men who still, even in these days of acceptance, find it hard to begin discussing their mental health and wellbeing.
According to the Mental Health Foundation, 1 in 8 men suffer from some sort of mental health condition, which encompasses everything from stress and panic attacks to depression and eating disorders.
It goes on to paint an even bleaker picture if the stats below are anything to go by:
- Three times as many men as women die by suicide.
- Men aged 40-49 have the highest suicide rates in the UK.
- According to the Government’s national wellbeing survey, men report lower levels of life satisfaction than women
- Men are less likely to access psychological therapies than women: only 36% of referrals to NHS talking therapies are for men.
So it’s clear from the evidence that men, generally speaking, are finding it difficult to accept they’re struggling but more importantly are struggling to reach out and access help.
Healthy conversations about mental health
The reasons for this are probably wrapped up in societal expectations and traditional gender roles. Men are still expected to “man up”, “grow a pair” or “stop being a girl” when dealing with difficult moments or emotional situations. “Boys don’t cry”, “suck it up” and “don’t be soft” are all things I remember hearing around me as I grew up in the Midlands.
Men are also more likely to use alcohol or drugs as a coping mechanism too, which can lead to more issues down the road.
Now whilst this may all seem a bit morose, there are lots of opportunities for men to start some good healthy conversations about mental health, either in the workplace or at home.
The Mental Health Foundation suggests there are 15 good places to start:
- Reach out - chat to a mate or colleague when you start to hide away
- Be listened to - have a chat and get it off your chest
- Follow social media accounts you can relate to
- Talk to someone who will listen and not ‘fix’ – a mate, colleague, family or a helpline
- Keep up with your routine - or add a new structure to your day
- Get outside for a short walk
- Make a motivational playlist
- Read a motivational or inspirational quote - to get perspective
- Do something new like volunteering
- Take up a new hobby
- Get out of your comfort zone - feel a sense of achievement from this
- Stop and pause – take time to check in with your head by using mindfulness, writing or meditation
- Focus on breathing – breathe in and out slowly for 3 minutes
- Switch off – in a way that works for you, e.g. with a book, film, video game etc.
- Ask a mate how they are – doing something for a mate can make you feel better
Communication is key
According to Mind, the number one reason men don’t talk about feelings or mental health is because of embarrassment. But when a poll was commissioned, the number one thing men said would encourage them to seek help was access to the right support from organisations and advice online.
So, it would appear that enabling men to seek help or begin good healthy conversations around mental health in the workplace starts with creating a non-judgmental environment. One where they can discuss what’s troubling them without being embarrassed or laughed at. And that the correct information, services and helplines are clearly signposted and easy to access.
Things are beginning to move in the right direction. There’s never been more help and support out there for men and the language to express their feelings and mental health is much more prevalent than it’s ever been.
So it’s time to start those good, healthy conversations that will hopefully lead to some positive thoughts, feelings and behaviours.
And this World Kindness Day? I’m going to spend it with two mates, having a laugh, putting the world to rights with a couple of pints of Guinness and watching England play rugby at Twickenham. All the while remembering my old friend David.
And If I’ve got time I’ll whack on Monsters Inc too…
TAGS - mental health and wellbeing, leadership and management